What’s on your mind?Category: NEED HELP/ADVICE (concerning life/relationships/work)Do you have any helpful advice for getting through a breakup?
Sheela Leigh Staff asked 5 months ago

(ANON QUESTION RECEIVED FROM GodfirstGodalways)

Do you have any helpful advice for getting through a breakup? I’ve been trying my hardest to turn to god but recently I can’t shake the feeling of suffocating sadness 🙁

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Sheela Leigh Staff answered 5 months ago

It’s hard for you to give all your focus to God because you haven’t yet understood the difference between worldly sorrow and godly sorrow. Worldly sorrow says “I’m too sad because this happened.” Godly sorrow is a sadness in your heart that you share with Christ, you sense the Lord’s sadness over a situation. You agree and share in His sadness. Are you suffocating of sadness because you don’t have that person in your life anymore or are you saddened because you know God was disappointed in how you handled and maintained the relationship? If it’s because you feel rejected and misunderstood that means you’re more aware of how sensitive you are instead of being more aware of how sensitive you should be towards God’s feelings.

My advice for you is to watch Christian vlogs on YT specifically on dating. Being equally yolked is important in a relationship. God knows what’s best for you and who’s best for you. Knowing what’s best for you requires a lot of daily time with Him. The reason most couples break up is because of a lack of discipline and self-control. Conflicts are much easier to overcome if both individuals stopped focusing on the problem and instead put God in the center. I’ve been through a couple of breakups and I remember one particular one where I experienced a sharp pain in my chest, almost like I was being stabbed. It hurt so much that it made me take my relationship with God even more seriously. You mustn’t let another heartache get the best of you before you take God more seriously. Right now begin to put Him first before anything. Don’t let the next person you date get in the way of your relationship with Him. Make Him number one because the more you get to know Him and love Him the more things fall into place, and that goes with anything else besides relationships.

The reason it fell apart was because you two weren’t walking in the same direction. If both of you are Christians then either one or both of you were not really walking in the faith. Don’t stay idle. Satan is really good at making you remember the past and putting negative thoughts in your head when you are not doing much. So get busy. Make sure you’re taking a lot of time in the Word so you’re reminded of your purpose and when you get busy do it all for God. If you’re suffering from this worldly sorrow you have to learn to grieve for what God grieves for. It’s important to get rooted in His wisdom and promises so you learn to see from His point of view and so that if you ever get into a breakup again, you’ll be certain that that person was not who the Lord intended for you, that He has someone better for you. Bottom line, take Him more seriously than you’ve ever before. Use pain as a trigger to focus more on Him because He’s the true healer of all hearts. I’ll be praying for you. God bless! 🙂

By His Grace, Sheela (Via godfirstgodalways)

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